Allah yir7amak ya Seedo. I can’t even begin to express how much I miss my Seedo. It’s been years since he passed, but these last couple of weeks have seen me spend moments of paralysis because I’ve been overwhelmed by my need to see him. He grounded me and I have felt anything but grounded as of late.
For some reason, in my family, I was the one who dreamt of both my Tata (grandmother) and Seedo shortly after their deaths and before anyone else did. As already mentioned elsewhere, there is a very deep tradition of dream interpretation in Islam and when you dream of someone whose left this world, it usually means that you’re seeing them as they are in the next one.
At the time I had this dream, there was a man who’d asked for my hand in marriage and they were waiting for a response. I didn’t like him and I didn’t trust him but I couldn’t put my finger on it.
I was sitting next to some plants on the main floor of an area that was surrounded by four buildings. There was no roof, and I couldn’t see an exit/entrance.
My grandfather walked into the area where I was sitting, looking no older than perhaps 40 years old. He was fit and he was full of life and he was wearing a beautiful three-piece green suit. He walked over to me and said ‘Be very careful and take very good care of yourself’ (this is a translation from Arabic and so has lost a little of it’s flavour). Then he was gone.
I understood instinctively that he was referring to the man who was waiting for an answer from me. I told mama about my dream and she understood why I had to say no. It was simple and straightforward and not questioned.
A few months later, we found out that he’d regularly beaten his ex-wife (his university sweetheart), placing her in the hospital on two occassions of which we’re aware.
Seedo was – and remains – a very respected and noted figure in Occupied Palestine. For some time, he worked with Gamal Abdel Nasser, and so would tell me stories about working with a man who serves as a heavyweight in the history of this world.
By trade, Seedo was a ‘principal’, the meaning of which differed then. ‘Principal’ referred to someone who not only ran a school but also established / built them from the ground up and from A to Z. His funeral was among the biggest in the Gaza Strip, and men – who were not related to my family – all over the world, opened their homes in mourning because Seedo ‘rabba ajyaal’, which means he raised generations.
He is considered among the men that built the very infrastructure of Palestine, and there isn’t anyone above the age of 40 in all of Palestine who doesn’t know my Seedo. This reality would sometimes be intimidating, most especially when he used to take me out with him.
Mama is his oldest and all of the siblings know that she was his favourite. That she had me, his first grandchild, sort of placed me in an unusually lucky place in his heart.
…all this to say there’s a website built and dedicated to a certain group of individuals who helped establish much of the infrastructure – among whom is my Seedo. I won’t post the link to the site, but here is my Seedo…front row, center. He’s the fifth man in from either the left side or the right…
The picture was taken somewhere between 1950 – 1955 on one of his school grounds, beneath the locust tree planted in the middle of the school. It’s my SEEDO!!!!
8 Comments:
yasmine said…
Maha, your ‘sailing with Seedo’ post made me all teary! what beautiful memories you have of him. i never had the opoprtunity to know either of my grandfathers, and that makes me sad.
Tue Oct 09, 03:02:00 PM
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Colleen said…
I really love that you write about your childhood and your seedo, Maha. It’s so incredible to see the history that made us span countries. I’ve said this before and will say it again, I am grateful for your story telling abilities 🙂
Yasmine, I’m sorry you didn’t have the chance to know either of your grandfathers. Is it because they passed when you were too young? No matter the reason, your grief at knowing neither was certainly shared by them also. I am sending you a hug, please don’t be sad.
Colleen
Tue Oct 09, 03:37:00 PM
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Anonymous said…
The story about the dream is intriguing and scary. Thank you for sharing this.
Tue Oct 09, 05:07:00 PM
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yasmine said…
aww Colleen, that was so beautiful of you. THANK YOU! and now you’ve gone and made me all teary-eyed, too, dammit. =) hugs back at you, rockstar.
yes, both my grandfathers died before i was born (one before my parents’ wedding, the other soon after). they were quiet, humble men, it seems, from what little i hear of them – my parents don’t talk about their fathers much, perhaps because it makes them sad, and also maybe because they were such simple men that there is not much to say about them. but i wish i had known them in person, so i could tell my own stories about them, as Maha does about her Seedo.
Wed Oct 10, 01:18:00 AM
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just a girl said…
“…maybe because they were such simple men that there is not much to say about them.”
Yasmine, you already know this, but I’m going to remind your gorgeous – & well ‘costumed’ 😉 – self. Every life lived is a life worth talking about. I think I’ve said this elsewhere, but we often forget that our parents and grandparents are sometimes adults before they ‘birth’ the next generation!
Simple or not, each one of your grandfathers was a gem. Allah made us all that way.
xoxoxox
m
Thu Oct 11, 05:59:00 PM
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Colleen said…
Yasmine, how lucky am I that you call me a rockstar!! Thank you so much and double hugs back at you 🙂
Colleen
Fri Oct 12, 12:51:00 PM
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Anonymous said…
Are you still considering writing a book? I think if you can’t do that yet you shuold really consider reworking all of these short stories about your fgamily and place thjem in a book as a collection.
John and I were discussin this last night and we bothj agreed that your writing has an interesting way of appealing to both sexes and to both Muslims and non and to anyone whose interested in politics and who;s not. ?You are really gifted, Maha, and as much as we adore your blog, we really want to see you published for so many others to discover as we have. You add fun to our relationship discussions as a couple, you know 😉
T
Fri Oct 12, 07:06:00 PM
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Maria Calvo said…
I love your stories about your family. This is awesome, it feels like your seedo lives here with us 🙂
Thanks for sharing and I hope your day is a beautiful cake filled one.
love
Maria
Tue Oct 16, 10:15:00 PM