Mindful Living
The Intimacy
We were discussing the difference in our romantic history when she said that she has learned much from how I carry myself with men. That I am a bluepr...
Sabbatical
The End
I couldn’t decide on which one to post, so you’re getting both. Since November 28, 2018, I have been writing daily. This is my last such e...
The Intimacy
We were discussing the difference in our romantic history when she said that she has learned much from how I carry myself with men. That I am a blueprint for…
The Exposed
A very unusual thing happened recently, which took me by surprise. Sitting with a group, I turned to someone and made the casual observation that they have not yet integrated…
The Three-Eyed Dog
Editorial note 1: The following is something I originally published on March 3, 2024 and holy fu(k everything which has transpired since, but especially 19 days later. That all aside,…
The Converts
Since publishing The Shelter of Conversion, I’ve received a surprising amount of emails asking How people convert to Islam. I’ve responded to all of them but thought it would be…
The Connect-Dot Brain
Speaking of broads… Some scientists posit that women experience life events more intensely, leading to better memory encoding, while others speculate that the neural basis of memory formation differs…
The Course
A shirt which I wear proudly reads Assata is welcome here. I learned her, Malcolm, Ali, Hooks, Morrison, and Fanon in my teenage years while looking for my identity. Love revolutionary,…
The Empath
This lovely art work is by Kelly Marcelle Malka and it was sent to me by a beauty of a heart who said it looked like something I might write…
The Left Behind
Who could you have become? Who could you have become but fought not to? So much time is spent celebrating our wins – what we have achieved, and what we…
The Disasters
Are you a glass half full or empty kind of person? I imagine if you’ve lived here for long enough, you must be a glass half full, or you’re hoping…
The Shadow
I spent the week tucked away in the warmth of a beloved. They have been through it. The absolute worst of it, in fact. Since before COVID, bad decision after…
The Shelter of Conversion
The Sufi tradition is focussed on developing and deepening a personal relationship with God through both self-knowledge and self-inquiry. Rumi(nation) is therefor a very natural part of existing on this…
The Unexpected
For my fiftieth, the gift of learning a new language with which I’ve always been in love – music. Oud, when I was younger, as it’s the melody of ancestors…
The Muse
3am conversation endings about what inspires me to write – several of the new pieces of late were written very differently over the course of the summer, but I needed…
The Healing One
Editorial note: This piece is a hundred different dots connected through one individual – the Healing One. I eventually mention them, near the end. I am writing to navigate and…
The Lying Du3aa
Preamble: For those new here, salaat is the Arabic word for the physically defined movements and recitations which Muslims complete five times a day, whereas du3aas are the personal asks…
The Bunker
She’s one of the closest sisters I have. Fifteen years ago when Sophia was born, I asked if she would raise her to call me Khalto which is the Arabic…
The Fiftieth
I’m fifty. Thank you for sticking around, friends, and for all of your support throughout the years. This has been my most transformative one yet. AlhamduliLaah. ————— Comments closed
The Balm
Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of the genocide, though May 15th was the 76th anniversary of the illegal occupation of my homeland, quickly turned to apartheid, annexation, settler colonialism,…
The Changing Seasons
The man who was unkind to you is not your soul mate. The man who dropped you the moment it became difficult is not your soul mate. The man who…
The Hurt
“Everything hurts,” I wrote. Since June 23rd, exactly. I have been living inside of grief, endless and without oxygen. I don’t shy away from any emotion; instead, I sit next…
The Ones Who Love
Every single thing roots back to this point: all things stem from love, or a lack thereof. For self, for lovers, for situations such as work, and friendships. I’d been…
The Heaviness
I’m still incapable of seeing anyone whose politics I’m not fully aware of. They came in from NY, en route to Nairobi. I adore M (the bright light two people…
The Six Degrees of Separation
That’s my girl Alia. Brown girl magic through and through and through. One of the beloveds; one of the very few who knows every inch of my world. We don’t…
The Journal of A Scorpio Moon
Over the course of 48 hours, I’ve had three people think I’m a Scorpio. In the past year, two others guessed the same; one of whom has become very important…
The Promise of Unbuttoned Shirts
“If people knew half of your history and how you’ve just been naturally protected in the past, they’d know that the Divine is what’s protecting you. And they just wouldn’t…
The Gentle Man
I am an open book. But most men can’t read. I don’t want a gentleman. I want a man whose faced his shadow and incorporated it into his open spaces….
The Meaning
My first cold in three years last week. Sick as a dog, I stayed away from everyone for 11 days (though at the 9th day mark, I did meet a…
The Healing
Stunning work by Eloy Bida. 2024 continues to confirm itself as one of my most uncomfortable years. Every month, there has been a specific date or two seared into my…
The Chain
Chimene told me this story while I was shadowboxing my own pain in 2018. Then, as I do today, I call these War Stories shared by women in our healing, a…
The Sexual and The Divine
There is no puritanical under or overtones in our religion. But it certainly exists in the patriarchy, and in orthodoxy both in service of men, to the detriment of women….
The Romancing Stone(s)
We made it to Sandia Peak, where I watched a man propose. As soon as we saw them, I’d said to Jennifer that he was going to propose. It was…
The Feral Dessert
I watched her for a while before deciding to sit with her. My four-card spread wasn’t a surprise. Tarot is intended more to help you focus, and to pull things…
The Reminders Series 1
Re-reading some heart-specific works, and will be posting some reminders for all of us over the coming while. From Secrets of Divine Love. ————— Comments closed.
The Ferdous
Allah loves beauty. And my People are beautiful. These are my cousins adults now still in Gaza. These are my cousins adults now still in Gaza two with their own…
The Forgiving Memory
As mentioned in The Trustworthy, here’s the short reflection on and explanation of the Muslim direction regarding letting people recover from their past mistakes – this idea that we’re not…
The Trustworthy
“Fare Thee with Patience And Grace because relationships are a cuntpunt.” (Bobby 3:16, 44) Aside from explosive physical chemistry, intellectual compatibility, and sharing laughter, there is one key element to…
The Sufi Teacher
I promised you I would write about converts like Mahmoud, and I will inshAllah. Until then, I will point you in the direction of one of my teachers – Musab…
The Principled
“I’d rather go broke or be on the street than lose my principles.” – Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf The bullsh!t that is the NBA needs to pay reparations. This is an absolute…
The Soul-Work
Desert-home and men in kohl, both are my birthright. For those who don’t know, it is sunnah for Muslim men to use kohl, and let me tell you, friends, it’s…
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